Musings of an Angel
by CyberForte
Summary: [Lord Yggdrasil Oneshot] A glimpse into the mind of Mithos Yggdrasil, Seraph of Cruxis.


Musings of an Angel

-A Lord Yggdrasil Oneshot-

-An undisclosed amount of time before the events of Tales of Symphonia-

What does it mean to be a hero? Is it having your name celebrated and exalted, to have legends built around your deeds? Or does it take more to be a true hero? For thousands of years, my name has been celebrated and exalted, and my deeds have truly become the stuff of legends, and yet, am I truly a hero? Once Mithos the Hero, I am now Yggdrasil, Lord of Cruxis. I chose my path, and would do so again and again, if I were to relive my life... How could I even consider choosing the happiness of the filthy inferior beings over your dream of a world without discrimination and mine to see you alive once more? Both of our dreams require sacrifices, and should I have chosen to be the hero, I could never bring about either. And, if I cannot have a world that does not discriminate against us and I cannot have you, what is there to live for? I do not know how I have lasted this long without you, my sister... Every day since your death, my heart has lost a fragment of itself, and I fear that soon, I will be able to care about nothing at all...

-At the beginning of the events of Tales of Symphonia-

That fool Remiel... I may have to dispose of him soon, his ambitions are growing too high, and I suspect that his arrogance will betray the true nature of things one day, if I keep him around. But, for the moment, he is the best choice to mark the new lamb... I hope to no end that she will be the one, I don't know how much longer my sanity will last if she is not. The girl looks promising, though; both in appearance and Mana signature, so maybe this will be it... Martel, I envy you, resting so peacefully... You have no idea what it feels like to be the highest power, even though you are the ones that the inferior beings worship... It is very difficult to sit here with nothing to believe in, even after all this time. I almost envy those of the inferior beings who accept my false Church; at least they have something to believe in, something they can imagine will offer them Salvation, no matter what evils they have done and something that they think has the power to save them completely... I would give a great deal for any of those three, truly. But I have none, so I must maintain myself. I am Yggdrasil, after all, and I must remain so if either of our dreams are ever to be realized, for it is because I have none of those things that I comprehend the truth; we will never have our dreams made real if we do not make them real ourselves.

-Sometime around the breaking of the second seal in Sylvrant-

Martel, each day that I go without you, my longing grows... But this girl may be the one! She seems utterly perfect thus far, and no one could deny her selflessness. She's just like you in almost every way, except of course that she is of the inferior race... I pity her companions, though, for I know only too well what it will feel like for them to lose her and to be betrayed all at once. I hope Kratos can do his job right, though... He seems to be growing very attached to his companions, and I do not want to lose his trust.. After all this, only he can be trusted, I only keep Yuan alive for your sake, my beloved sister... At times, I envy what the two of you had. I have never had occasion to experience love of that sort, I was always too busy, first with the war, and now with attempts to call you back from nothingness... But I must admit, I've had a great temptation to see if my body is still capable of responding to such things. I expect it would be, Kratos's was, even if it was of the inferior race, and we both understand how overly fertile those dogs are. But my point still stands, and I know that any of the female lifeless beings who fill my surroundings would gladly have me... I still somehow never could bring myself to, though. Maybe, someday after you've returned to me, dear sister, you can explain to me how it is possible to love someone in a way different from that in which I love you, for I fear that I shall never understand if you do not...

-Around the breaking of the 3rd Sylvrant seal-

Now that I understand things, I see even more danger to Kratos's loyalty in this affair, but even more potential in the lamb... It complicates things that the boy who has made it possible for our lamb to come this far loves her far too much, and it is even more unfortunate that he is Kratos's child. If I do not play this correctly, I may lose both Kratos and the girl, so I shall take extra precautions, as I cannot afford to lose either, the former for my sake, and the latter for that of your awakening. I put no faith in Remiel at this point, for it is a nearly sure thing that he will perish before this business is concluded; the will to keep the lamb to himself in that inferior being is too powerful for it to go otherwise, although should he succeed in eliminating the obstacle posed by the boy, I shall spare his life for now. If not, I expect that the fool will die trying, he underestimates the inferior beings, especially those driven by desires and emotions. If he does fail, I expect that I shall need to intervene, as Kratos will try, but he has not the will...

-Around the breaking of the Tower of Mana seal-

So close, now... But, something strikes me as off... Once, all the spirits had pacts with me... But, when the seal of light was broken, Luna appeared before them. That should not have occurred. And they may soon take the other spirits, for I realize now... That wretched assassin is a summoner, and I fear that now, even should I not be required to kill the chosen's companions to take her, they cannot be allowed to continue their actions. They have signed their own death sentences... Why must those damned inferior beings always find some way to meddle in my affairs! But, if that girl is the one, maybe we can stop all these sacrifices and work towards your dream together! We will free the world of discrimination, and all shall be equal...the same. The hero in me wishes there was another way, but that's idealistic; this is the only way to fulfill your dream, my beloved sister... I only hope that you understand that when you awaken... You were always such an idealist, but back then, none of us yet knew that without ruthless pursuit, ideals will slip away and die. We MUST do this, in order to save you...and these two worlds that I have created. There is simply no other way, Martel, none...

-As the chosen's group confronts Remiel in the Tower of Salvation-

The time is finally coming, Martel. The girl has given up her soul freely, and her body shall belong to you soon... Oh, how long I have waited for this day... She seems like such a perfect match, it must succeed! It must! Soon, you shall stand at my side once more, my sister. And then our ideals shall be realized...! Even as my final doubts fade, my heart becomes more sure with every passing second that we shall succeed... You shall live again, Martel! ...But I must go soon. I must descend to the wretched world, for Remiel has perished, and in the situation, I dare not trust Kratos to bring you to me, for it would mean the death of his son. He could no more kill that human than I could kill you, so I must play the villain once more. I will kill the child, and his companions... And then I shall come to you, Martel! I swear to you that you shall live again! But I must depart now... I shall return soon, my beloved sister Martel. I am Yggdrasil, Lord of Cruxis, and I know what I must do. I shall sweep away all of them, and bring to you the body that will let you live with me again! Glory to our coming age of Half-Elves, and those who stand in our way shall now disappear into nothingness!


End file.
